Crabs

Listening to the local radio this morning, they were discussing the idea of adopting the American way of the benefit system. They use the criteria that you must do some form of voluntary work before you get your money? Now I realise that there are genuine cases out there, but for one genuine case there is another sponger. So it would have to be means tested. That would mean that the genuine people out of work who desperately need a little more cash, could get it. When I left the Army I was a poorly lad to say the least and had to sign on to try and get my life together. I did sign on for a short while but I also took voluntary work each day to make up for it. I texted the prog and it would seem that 9 out of 10 people agreed. However you always get the 'fluffy pink see the world through rose coloured glasses git' who disagrees and live in fairy land grrr.
Out on a private hire today. One bloke was talking about the first removal of a body he went on with his dad. It was a hermit type that had passed away. In them days they only took a board and cover to remove the deceased. It was unfortunate therefore that the person had died in a crouching position, and could not be laid out flat on the board. So the blokes Dad did the only thing he could do. He pressed down very hard on the dead persons knees to straighten them. Unfortunately this caused the body to sit up and make a gurgling sound. His son legged it across a field and took some coaxing to come back.
Dead bodies do make noises sometimes when you move them. The first time I heard it, I had to admit it was a sphincter twitcher to say the least.
I always know when I have 'posh' people in the back of my Limo. If I put the windows in the back down, then they will want them up. If they were up then they want them down? I am so glad I am poor.
My partner has told me that I talk in my sleep. I don't believe her though as no one at work has remarked on it?