Being the brave little soldier I am (ha) I went back to work this morning and the wonderful world of the dearly departed. To be honest it probably has occupied my mind somewhat being with work colleagues and I have not been as deeply thinking as I would have been on my own. I also did a fairly heavy carry without anything 'bursting' or 'breaking' so every day without it happening again is a good one.
I am a deep thinker I admit, but we cant completely alter how we are. I suppose if their was an Olympic Event for worrying then I would bring back Gold every time. Really, it is only because I care, that I worry so much and envy people who do not have a care in the world?
I have also been very careful where I have squirted the tomato ketchup today as I really could do without any more scares.
The lady vicar who was in front of my Limo today was telling me about her having to call an Ambulance out to herself a few weeks ago. Not once, but twice! Having woken up in the night with a pulse of over 200 bpm. It turns out that it is Anxiety related (you would think a Vicar would be calm as they are in the know?) and is now being treated with meds. It's amazing how many people suffer in this world and in her case, just a dream can triggered it. I can honestly say that I am not as bad as when I got out of the Army but it is still with me and comes to pay a visit once in a while. Unless I win the Lottery and become a Doris Day (she became somewhat of a recluse) then I am stuck with it. Fight the Fear...as they say.
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